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Thursday, January 5, 2012

Paleo Spaghetti Squash Breakfast Bake

So I went to a sports venue the other night. A basketball game to be exact. I know what you’re thinking, ‘omgIlovebasketballgames. Men in shorts. omgomgomg.’ Unless you're a straight dude, then you're thinking 'omgIlovesports. omg insert sports jargon here.' That’s not how I felt about the matter. Have you actually looked at any of those bros, like UP CLOSE? Ew. Those dudes are ugly. Tall, gangly, and broed out. CrossFitters are so much more attractive. Anywho, my girlfriend Zanna (who may be one of the greatest cooks/bakers alive...she's going to cooking school in NY...NBD!!!) bought us all tickets to go to a Nuggets game and bond as friends. She's adorable. She made almond butter stuffed dates for the game. Holy balls, she's awesome. Well after I threw a fit about having to go downtown on a Sunday night and deal with drunk sports fan, I put my big girl pants on (meaning lululemon spandex) and stopped being a b*tch. Then proceeded on downtown, where I entered the Pepsi Center for the first time. I didn't even know what that huge ass building was until that night. I'm so not with the times.

So the game started. We had to stand until the first basket was made. What the sh*t is that about?! Are we in grade school?? I have to stay standing until the teacher says so. Bullsh*t. Anyways, Tom, being the amazing man that he is, tried to explain what was going on. I blacked out. Then Sergio and I wandered around the arena (is that what it's called?) looking at all the different creepy food stations. It smelt like cheese melting on pizza mixed with crushed cheetos on top. Yeah, that sounds effing amazing, but it kinda utterly disgusting all at the same time. There was a nachos station, pasta station, chili cheese steak station, A DONUT STATION with freaking chocolate dipping sauce...what the hell has this world come to?! But then we found the candied nuts station. Ahhhh sh*t no. I wasn't going to say no to that. Sugared pecans!? Hello god. Sergio could see my eyes light up. He bought me some :) I think it was him trying to parent me so I wouldn't throw a fit while at the game. Smart man. 

I honestly can't complain about the game. I MAYBE watched 30 seconds of the entire thing. But I think people just like being social with other people. That's why they go to games. The people who actually like watching the game are just idiots....sooooo I guess that means all the people I was with. Whatever. The half time show was wicked awesome. These little 14 year olds would run and jump on a trampoline and do little fliperoos into slam dunks. No, seriously, this sh*t was awesome. I wish I had no fear. And weighed 96 pounds. Ok, that's a lie. I'd much rather be 98 pounds. Jesus, I'm kidding. Stop sh*tting yourself.

Speaking of sh*t, I just ate a pound of homemade chocolate cashew butter. Going to regret that decision in the morning. Laura tried consume a large amount, but her small frame couldn't handle it. She felt like she was gonna vomit. Amateur. And just FYI...we may have gone to Whole Foods to creep again tonight. Not saying we did...but we may have.

What you need:
  • 8 eggs, whisked
  • 1 sweet potato, shredded
  • 1 sweet onion, finely diced (I ran mine through the shredded with my sweet potato)
  • 1 spaghetti squash, halved and seeds removed
  • 1 tablespoon tarragon
  • 1 tablespoon thyme
  • 1 tablespoon parsley
  • 1 tablespoon garlic powder
  • salt and pepper, to taste
  • 1 tablespoon fat (I used bacon fat, smart)
What you do:
  1. Preheat your oven to 425.
  2. Cut your spaghetti squash in half. Spoon out the seeds and discard. Don't be afraid to put some back into it.
  3. Place spaghetti squash cut-side down on a cookie sheet. Bake for around 20-25 minutes of until spaghetti squash is soft to the touch. It should give a little.
  4. While your spaghetti squash bakes, crack all your eggs into a bowl and whisk together.
  5. Then shred your sweet potato. I used my always wonderful shredding attachment on my food processor. YOU STILL HAVEN'T BOUGHT A FOOD PROCESSOR?? Jesus. Buy one.
  6. Now you can either send your onion through the food processor or chop it yourself. Think about how easy your life could be if you sent it through a food process. There ya go.
  7. After they are done shredding away, add your fat source to a large skillet over medium-high heat. Plop in your sweet potato and onions and cover to let cook down.
  8. Randomly flip the sweet potatoes and onions and stir them up a bit to be sure they don't stick to the bottom of the pan or been. Keep covered until the sweet potatoes are soft and delicious.
  9. Remove from heat.
  10. Your spaghetti squash should be done at this point, so take it out of the oven and use a fork to remove the threads. Add them directly to your egg mixture.
  11. Turn your oven down to 400 degrees.
  12. Then throw your sweet potato and onion mixture in the bowl with your eggs and spaghetti squash and add all your seasonings.
  13. Mix together. Add some salt and pepper as need.
  14. Now grease an 8x8 glass baking dish. Pour your egg mixture in the dish.
  15. Bake your egg casserole for around 25-30 minutes. This b*tch is dense so make sure it is cooked all the way through before you pull it out to rest. I checked it out by pulling it out of the oven and poking at the middle part of the egg dish. If my finger sunk in, it wasn't done. Obv. It should bounce back at you. Like fluffy eggs do. Rhymer, that I am.
  16. Let sit for 5+ minutes to cool and meld all together. I even ate this cold the next day. 
Watch my eggs squares do kama sutra.

just getting a lil friendly.
missionary.
sooooo not even going there.

    6 comments:

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    3. What type of food processor do you use?

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    4. This looks sooooooooo goood!! PS I am sitting at corepower and pretty sure xfitters from Broadway just ran pass me. Haha I need to come back for some more awesome coaching by the amazing JB :).

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    5. I use Cuisinart- 9 cup!

      Danielle- come in again!! glad you didn't see me running by weazing like i was going to die. haven't done 400s in a while lol

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    6. www.bestpaleodietcookbook.com

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