Pages

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Paleo Southwest Meatloaf

Holy balls. I can barely walk today. I did pistols the other day. No I didn't shoot things, I did one legged squats. Guns kinda scare me. But seriously, if you want your ass to feel like someone literally took a slab of muscle out of your donk, used a tenderizer on it, then put it back in your body...do pistols. That doesn't sound fun? Well, if my ass hurts this bad (especially considering it's size), there has to be some kind of muscle gains from this movement, right? My hopes are that my butt is going to look like gold starting tomorrow. I'm going to look in the mirror and it's just going to bounce back at me. That didn't make sense. But you know what I mean. Probably not.

As I've become more and more into CrossFit over this year and a half, I've noticed I look at guys butts more often. I used to never notice that sh*t. Nor did I notice the size of their calves. Now I always look at both. I feel like a guy. But butt size and calf size often say a lot about a man's workout routine. In turn, it says a lot of their personality. You see, I hang around some pretty good looking guys, with great calves AND butts, so I'm often judgmental with other guys I meet. Do I sound like a b*tch? Totally do. But that's besides the point. I just like a great butt, ok?

Speaking of beef cakes, I love meatloaf. So it was about time to make a new meatloaf recipe. Meat in loaf form just makes more sense. And seems to be more fun to eat. It really makes no sense but it does in my mind. But you all have seen what my mind is capable of. I just love ground meat. I plan on making a new chili recipe every day next week. I'm gonna have a balls ton of food at my house. You excited? Me too. Wanna come over and have a dinner date?? See you soon.

By the way, I'm sitting on a lacrosse ball at a coffee shop right now. Inappropriate? Maybe to some. To me it means some newly flexibly hamstrings so I can walk again. K bye.

What you need:
  • 1.5 lbs ground beef
  • 1 egg, whisked
  • 3/4 cup almond flour
  • 1 green pepper, chopped
  • 1 red pepper, chopped
  • 1 red onion, chopped
  • 1 garlic clove, minced
  • 2 tablespoons hot sauce (I used Cholula)
  • 1 tablespoon chili powder
  • 1 teaspoon smoked paprika
  • 1 teaspoon cumin
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon pepper
  • 1 tablespoon fat (I used olive oil)
What you do:
  1. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.
  2. Heat a large skillet under medium-high heat, add fat and minced garlic to the oil. Once the garlic has become fragrant, add your green pepper, red pepper, and onions.
  3. Cook until onions are translucent then remove from heat.
  4. Add your meat, egg, almond flour, spices, hot sauce, and cooked veggies to a large bowl. Mix together.
  5. Place meat mixture in two bread loaf pans (at least they're useful for something) and pat down.
  6. Cook for 30-35 minutes.
  7. Top with guac!! Consume

20 comments:

  1. YUM! I will be making this tonight. Going to add some shredded carrots in place of green bell....should be yummy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. How strange! I had turkey meatloaf with very similar seasonings this morning. elite eat alike.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Gina- That should be delicious!!

    F*cking elite Chris.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Love. Your. Blog. Laughing. at. work.

    Thank you. : )

    ReplyDelete
  5. SCHANELL!!! Why the hell haven't I seen you in 243 years?!

    Kaitlin- my lord that's the truth

    ReplyDelete
  6. I made this last night with venison and chili garlic sauce in place of the hot sauce. It rocked. Thanks! I shared it on my blog too.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Just made this. I win again for being smart enough to do as Juli says. Thanks for another funny blog and outstanding recipe!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Yummmmm journey of two!!!

    Yay Aaron!! Glad you liked it!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Juli, I love you. Plain and simple. And my wife doesn't know but my daughter is cooking your food and benefiting from your recipes. I'm benefiting from your humor and kindness. Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thank you so much Jim!! I'm not sure if you read my posts though...I'm not exactly kind ;) hope your wife likes the food as well!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hey, just wanted to say that I stumbled upon this website via chowstalker... made this recipe... thought it was awesome... and now find myself ever critical of peoples' calf-al region.

    ReplyDelete
  12. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hey Juli, this one turned out awesome!. Anyway, love your recipe's and your crazy ass rants. You remind me of what I imagine a pirate must be like in real life. The question is, would you have a hooked hand or wooden leg. As far as a your feathered friend goes... we both know you would eat it because it would not stop squawking. FYI, you spell your name wrong, you should look into getting that shit fixed.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Lol a pirate? Never got that, but I'm cool with it. I'd be a wicked good pirate. And I probably smell like one already anyways. And what's up with my name? My mom wanted me to be different. She succeeded with or without the name.

    ReplyDelete
  15. It's alright about your name... I wonder if it pronounced like Julie or July ( if it's July, I am sorry you have a horrible name ). Anyway, glad I found you online, you're pretty awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  16. My name is not July. Is it really that confusing? If it is, you can call me Ju. That's what my roommate calls me. Simple, to the point, and offensive to some. How did u find my blog peter?

    ReplyDelete
  17. I am glad your name is not July, that would just be stupid, I think we can both agree on that ;) I just have a messed up last name and it pisses me off when people say it wrong. Figured people probably call you July sometimes and it makes you punch them.

    Anyway, I just started getting into Paleo and wanted to find some good recipe sites. The other ones are boring as hell, your's is pretty much perfect ( but you could use a little more attitude in your posts, I can barely get a feel of what kind of person you are here ).

    I think I will call you Ju, but only if you are of the Jewish faith ( then it's ok to point at you and say, look at that smelly Ju - and watch as people go OMG!!! ). Otherwise, Juli is fine.

    I will also have to pass on your offer to be your roommate, we barely know one another, it would be weird. But thanks anyway :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. More attitude? If that's not sarcasm I must be doing something wrong. My mom sometimes begs me to not curse as much. My blog posts are exactly who I am. Minus my nightly face washing habits. No one cares about that.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Yes, it was sarcasm. Your blog posts, like you, are 100% awesome. Thanks again.

    ReplyDelete
  20. No thank u Peter! Let me know if u try anything! Thanks so much for commenting!

    ReplyDelete