Asian Pork Ribs over Tangy Slaw

My feet smell. I don't care if you didn't want to know that, you should. So I recently decided to invest in new shoes since my friends kept viciously attacking me for still wearing large running shoes. Ok, they didn't attack me, but that's besides the point. I guess when you CrossFit, you are suppose to have the flattest shoes possible and be one with nature. Whatever. I liked my running shoes. I did 100 overhead squats in those bulky running shoes at Regionals and felt fine about it. But I thought that I might as well give into the peer pressure and I went out to purchase some New Balance Minimus shoes. They're pretty legit. They form to your foot like almond butter forms perfectly to my spoon. You know EXACTLY what I mean. But man, they smell BAD. And I've only had them for seriously 2 weeks. Makes no sense. I mean, I know I'm an incredibly sweaty person, and I know I sometimes don't shower for a couple days, but they shouldn't smell THAT bad. It makes me uncomfortable. I can't imagine what people around me feel like.

Now that we've talked about the important stuff, let's talk about the ribs. These little ribs were delicious. The only problem is I have a naughty dog in my house that tends to eat things off the counter. Including these ribs. Hell no it's not my dog. It's Laura's. Thank god she's incredibly awesome and pretty as all hell or I'd let the dog out the back door. Kidding...kind of. She knows I'm heartless, it's fine. But these ribs and slaw definitely turned out well! RJ tasted them and said they were one of the best paleo meals he's had since they had so much flavor to them...but let's remember RJ usually consumes chicken and broccoli every day, so my smelly ass shoes would have probably ignited his taste buds as well. Anyways, these ribs would be delicious with beef spare ribs as well. Try it, do it, make it, love it. I'm like daft punk.

What you need:

For the pork ribs--

• 1 gallon sized ziploc bag
• 2lbs pork ribs
• 2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
• 2 tablespoons coconut aminos (or liquid aminos or wheat free soy sauce)
• 2 tablespoons honey
• 1 tablespoon sesame oil
• 1 teaspoon fish sauce
• 1 tablespoon ginger
• 1/2 tablespoon red pepper flakes
• 1/4 teaspoon salt and pepper
• 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1/4 teaspoon onion powder
• 1-2 tablespoons coconut oil

For the asian slaw:

• 1 bag broccoli slaw (or coleslaw)
• 2 tablespoons coconut oil
• 2/3 cup almond butter
• 1 tablespoon raw honey (raw tastes so much better!!)
• 1 tablespoon ginger (I used ginger powder, but freshly grated would be even better!)
• 1 tablespoon siracha
• 1 teaspoon coconut aminos
• 1 teaspoon fish sauce
• 1 lime, juiced
• salt and pepper, to taste
• chicken stock or water to help thin it out

What you do:

1. Ribs gotta be marinated. They just have to. So buy these a day early, stop complaining, and marinate them overnight. It's worth it, ok?
2. So grab your large ziploc bag, throw the ribs in it along with the rest of the ribs ingredients. Zip up the bag and shake that biotch up. Really rub all the ingredients all over the ribs. Don't be shy. Let the ribs rest in the ziploc bag, in the fridge, overnight.
3. The next day, pull those happy lil' ribs out of the fridge to let sit on the counter and come to room temperature before you cook those suckers.
4. While they are resting, you will begin to get your slaw together. Pull out a large skillet and add your coconut oil to the pan over medium-high heat.
5. Once the oil is hot, add your broccoli slaw along with all other ingredients and stir together until you get a even coat around the slaw. If it is a bit thick, add a tablespoon or two of water or chicken stock to help break it up. Add as many as needed until you have the desired consistency for your slaw.
6. Once the slaw is at a desired consistency, turn the heat down low to cook while your get your ribs ready.
7. For your ribs, first cut them into separate ribs, then pull out a dutch oven or large sauce pan, add a bit of coconut oil to it and add your ribs to brown on all sides.
8. Once they have browned, add your slaw on top along with a bit more chicken stock or water to make sure the ribs don't burn on the bottom.
9. Cover and reduce heat to let simmer for 25-30 minutes, depending how thick your ribs are.
10. Once the ribs are cooked through, eat them with the slaw. So good.

_________________
By the way, I absolutely did not form this plate or make this picture pretty. RJ looked at the plate I set up for pictures and was not having is, thus he made the picture appetizing. Let's compare shots.

Yes, this is my photography skills. It looks like dog food. Maybe that's why Sam (the asshole) ate it. Damnit Sam.

RJ's fine photography skills.

 Ya...I suck. Thank god I have friends.

________________________

Grocery Store Helper:

• Pork spare ribs: on sale at Sunflower Market
• Broccoli slaw: by the packaged salad, you can find it at Sunflower Market or King Soopers
• Almond butter: by in the grind-your-own section at Sunflower Market or Whole Foods (WAY cheaper)
• Coconut aminos: found at Whole Foods but you can find it online as well